Sex And The Memory of Sexual Experience

Recent scientific research is beginning to investigate the relationships between experience and the memories of experience. Researchers are seeing that certain areas of the brain light up depending on the thoughts, actions and experiences of a person. Detailed maps of the brain now exist for the repeated patterns that we human's experience. There are precise regions of the brain that light up when we see our child or grandchild. Everyone has similar patterns with slight variations that depend on how you feel about that child or grandchild. The rush of 'love' chemicals; dopamine, oxytocin, endorphins, opiates and other neurotransmitters, fill our body and brain quickly to produce the incredible feelings of love and attachment that are involved in the profound moment when that child's eyes light up upon seeing you and hugging you.

Like any event, if this series of actions happens a few times, the solidifying effect in your body/brain becomes codified and remains. If you come across a picture of that child, and the memory of the happy face and hug has the opportunity to become visceral, you can experience the same 'rush' though you may be sitting by yourself half way across the world. The same exact regions of your brain are lighting up as they did when the real event happened. That's why we can cry at the drop of a hat sometimes or smile when nothing but a fond memory traces our mind. And we can experience even more physical manifestations during these memories too. You only have to recall a very bad memory or experience, to 'feel' it all over again in your body.

Our memories dictate how we will feel about a similar situation because our brain and body is coded from past experience. If you are a person who has had a series of unfortunate or 'bad' experiences with intimacy, relationship or sexuality, these memories are codified in your brain/body. You probably relate to them as 'real' and consider that they will always be a part of you. Scientists are discovering that this isn't true. Our brains are much more 'plastic' than they ever understood. But how do we change our mind/body experiences, and memories of the experiences, so that we can have a fresher, newer outlook? How do we shift if we're so plastic?

One of the tenants of neo-Tantra is just say 'Yes' to everything! While I actually don't advocate for that, especially for beginners, I do believe that saying yes sometimes, with a calculated risk assessment, is a very good thing. When you say yes to something that is risky you are being brave and you are probably about to have an experience that will make a shift in your perspective, especially if you make the decision to go forward consciously. That shift has the potential to lead you out of a negative feedback loop and into a more balanced attitude about the past experiences that do not feel so good now. This takes courage to change.

Scientists are beginning to understand that it takes very little brain 're-wiring' to make changes in our brains but the 'little' has to be pretty big to make the change. In other words, risk, boundary breaking and most importantly trust has to occur in order to make the profound changes that are needed. So if you have had some not-so-pleasant experiences with intimacy, or maybe reaching an orgasmic state, then a whole new way of approaching the situation may cause a break through to occur. Your brain/body can make a profound change for the better.

Many people have done this during experiences with skilled teachers, healers and workshop leaders in the Tantra community. Sometimes it's difficult and sometimes it happens easily. There's no guarantee ever but one thing that is assured is that the door will open to the opportunity to see things differently; to understand that our brains, bodies and memories are not frozen in us but malleable and changeable. Old memories can be transformed and new ones can grow and nourish us more fully.

On a personal level, I believe that the mind, body and 'spirit' manifest powerfully within us. They work so tightly together that it is a small wonder that modern science hasn't made more discoveries about their interconnectedness than it has in recent years. It makes me wonder if we will be able to keep up emotionally, educationally and rationally with many of these discoveries. Reading and studying about scientific breakthroughs is an important part of basic education and many of the current fascinating discoveries would help us right now with personal growth and evolution. Yet it takes years for many of these discoveries to come to light.

I know that scientists like to have proven results, beyond a doubt, but in the fields of sexuality, spirituality, energy, quantum physics, meditation and neurology the many deductions that can be formed from the current science aren't being expressed, and speculated on, as much as I would like to see. Maybe speculative ideas are going on behind closed doors, in the academic institutions doing research in these areas, but I would like to hear more about them.

Suzie Heumann is the founder of Tantra.com. She studies, writes, has authored three books and makes films about conscious sex, Tantra and the Kama Sutra. Check out Tantra.com Premium for the most comprehensive tantra training available on the Internet!

Thank You Darwin: Phallus Evolution

It's Darwin's 200th birthday this year and we'll be hearing a lot about him, I'm sure. I'm looking forward to seeing the new movie Creation, which is about his life and will include a look at his fear of reporting all he understood about evolution. Given the Victorian culture he lived in, no wonder he hesitated for some 50 years before he put On The Origin of Species out to the public.

My own evolution wanderings have caused me to wonder for a long time about why the human penis is structured the way it is. Why would evolution make the penis have a head on it, with an obvious bulbous, almost ad-on bigger part? Why does it have that extra skin, the foreskin, added to the mix? And, for that matter, why is that skin cut off (I know about the religious part, I just mean how did it really start)? I won't be covering that one.

I have some ideas about all of this and I'm hoping you'll chime in too.

Why do pigs have corkscrew penises? Why do Orcas' have bones in theirs and ends that 'grab' on to things? Why do some monkeys have barbs on theirs? I don't really care so much about these penises except that they do show that there is a vast arena of shapes, sizes and peculiarities about the phallus world. But most animal penises are straight and smooth so why does the human penis have a head on it?

If you consider the details in the shape of every male phallus you can't help but notice the head attached to the shaft. It is almost unique in the world of animals. The great, revered, male tool goes along nice and straight, for the most part, and then, right there on the end, it has a head on it - a nice generous head, for that matter, but an add-on piece non-the-less. The interior tissue is even different than that of the shaft. Some penises have bigger heads than others but, basically, it's there. There are more nerve endings near the underside called the frenulum where the foreskin is attached and around the head (the corona), and more girth, generally speaking. It's also got an interesting shape sort of like a heart or arrowhead with one side longer than the other. All-and-all, a little strange when it comes down to it.

Of course, I have a theory.

Close to the point of no-return, or ejaculation, the head of the penis actually swells. This can be felt by some women (with tight PC muscles) and can allow them to help their man learn ejaculation mastery by slowing down and reminding their lover to breathe and relax. The partners have to be pretty darn connected, though, so don't rely on just this method without practice.

Upon closer examination you can see that the upper lip of the head, or corona, is thicker than the lower part on the frenulum side. In some men it is a lot thicker. If you consider frontal intercourse positions (something that is supposed to distinguish us from many of the higher apes) then what is this thickness for? Why is it there? Evolutionarily there is always a reason.

I propose it is there for direct stimulation of the G-spot. There is no other reason. Evolution has triumphed yet again! Oh yeah, and we women are the lucky receivers of this male evolution, though we helped men co-create it. Many thanks to you evolving guys for your care in doing this for us! Seriously.

Being of the firm belief that doing your Kegel or PC muscle exercises (more on these in a future post) every day is of the utmost importance, I see a connection between these muscles, just to the interior of a woman's yoni (Sanskrit for vagina), and the head on the penis. The G-spot is located just beyond the entrance to the yoni and also just beyond the layer of muscles call the Pubococcygeus muscles or PC muscles. These muscles get thick upon adequate exercise. When they are very strong and in good shape all kinds of good Karma comes to the person who has exercised them. No leaking upon dancing or laughing, much stronger orgasms, orgasms - period, female ejaculation, exotic artist-like abilities during sex and a pelvic floor that can hold up your insides through thick and thin.

The thicker the muscles get, and the tighter the opening, the better in shape the muscles are. What happens is that a wall builds up at the entrance of the yoni that is formidable. This thicker 'wall' actually enhances the G-spot area but for purposes here let's just say that on the inside of that wall, a barrier to exit is created when her muscles are strong. As the ridge of the phallus head passes by the G-spot, on the outstroke, it gets 'caught' on the enhanced muscles and provides much more stimulation to the G-spot area. That thick ridge is there for a purpose - woman's pleasure. If the man pauses here and makes little tiny in-and-out movements it could send her into orgasm. If she squeezes her muscles just as he is at the end of his outstroke, well...

Understanding this can make a huge difference in how both lovers interact during intercourse. Here's the best video example I can give that will visually show the ridge's importance to the G-spot. Watch specifically the head of the lovely anatomically correct bone dildo as it comes back out from the ring I'm making with my thumb and forefinger.





Let's keep co-evolving! Comments and experiences please!



Suzie Heumann is the founder of Tantra.com. She studies, writes, has authored three books and makes films about conscious sex, Tantra and the Kama Sutra. Check out Tantra.com Premium for the most comprehensive tantra training available on the Internet!

Add Intensity To Life: Pay Attention

I'm reminded of Witness Consciousness today. The world is changing outside of my window. Fall is splashing her golden hues all over the place and this makes it relatively easy to be hyper-conscious of the beauty and life that is all around me. Forget stress, the economy and my messy house - it's gorgeous out there!

It takes many varying practices to become more conscious. Right now I'm paying attention to nature in all of its glory. Last night I was paying attention to breath, sensual sensations and my G-spot. Later today I will even pay good attention to finishing my taxes. It's all the same really.

How does one promote consciously being able to witness ones self? There are many, many ways but I like to use the breath as a starting point. Watching my breath and breathing into my belly - softly, fully - is one of the practices I like. It's like a mini-meditation each time I do it.

Years ago I started this practice and would remember it maybe 20 times a day. I would put post-its on the front door and stickers on the steering column of my car. I would try to 'just remember' - I used all kinds of mechanisms to learn to pay attention to how I was breathing. The interesting thing is that this practice got me used to remembering multiple times a day to just pay more attention to whatever I was doing. The other sure-fire way is to practice meditation.

Research in the past few years is confirming that practices like meditation improve not only focus and attention but that it improves cognition, also. This is not only true of those practiced at meditation but of those new to the practice, too. A study reported in June of 2007 from researchers Amishi Jha and Michael Baime of the University of Pennsylvania found that mediation changes the way the brain works at the level of attention, the ability to prioritize, manage tasks and goals, focus on specific information and stay alert in whatever environment a person might find themselves in. Research has also found that improving attention makes whatever you are experiencing seem more intense.

Once I felt accomplished in my practice of mini breathing meditations, so that I could more fully witness myself, I moved this practice more deliberately to sex. After years of practicing and learning all about my body, my lover's body and all the myriad ways we could pleasure each other I could finally let go of the 'thinking' about those moves and begin to 'witness' my self during sexual experiences. This isn't about judgment or critical thinking or even imagination or fantasy - it's about the gentle practice of witnessing. To witness one simply watches with ease and wonder what is happening to them.

When you get good at this it becomes really useful. If I'm enjoying some great sex and I notice "Oh, that is an interesting sensation. I'm going to breathe into that touch, put more attention on it and see what happens." Or maybe we've gotten ourselves into a new position and I like it but I notice that my G-spot isn't quite being stimulated to my liking. We don't stop what we're doing and find a new position I simply move slightly one way or another to make a subtle shift. If I hadn't been able to gently 'witness' this about myself I could have blamed, gotten frustrated or even quit all together.

It's just like that, simple and useful. The 'witness' helps us to add on to the experience. When you get good at this you can really explore and up-the-ante on your experiences, what ever they are. It's a playful practice that becomes an increasingly interesting sort of arousal stimulator. And I'm using it today because of the beauty all around me - nature is arousing me and I'm using this experience to make it even more exquisite so I can enjoy the taxes and enjoy the garden and enjoy the sex and enjoy this life!

Playfulness - Can Getting Experimental Lead To Orgasm?

Women have a lot of complaints about their male lovers. It's one of the reasons that women are unhappy, I think. They get frustrated feeling as though they have to teach their lover over and over again and then, over the years, they just give up. Great sex doesn't happen naturally despite the prevalence of the myth that says it's supposed to 'just happen naturally'.

I am sure that the most inspiring, out-of-this-world sex you've ever had was a result of good technique, great set and setting (music, lighting, location, vibes), playfulness, a lengthy time period but most importantly a lover who was fully present with you. This combination of factors doesn't just happen naturally. It takes practice and consciousness.

The truth is, though, that you are responsible for your own pleasure. You're lover isn't responsible, you are. It helps to have a trained lover but there are ways that women can better advocate for themselves in the arena of great sex. It requires work (fun work), a sense of playfulness, a commitment to conscious communication, body knowledge, a sense of your own adventure-driven nature, time and a sense of amazement and wonderment.

Surveys and sexuality reports tell us that roughly 20% of sexually active women have orgasms during intercourse. Assumptions will need to be made about that number because we don't know if that includes manual stimulation of the clitoris during intercourse or not and several other issues that might skew the statistics. I personally find this number to be a sad testament to Western culture's lack of understanding that sex is a healthful addition to anything we might do for our physical and mental wellbeing.

Orgasms are important to women no matter how convincing the idea of being in pleasure without being goal oriented is. Some of the time you can do this and some of the time you want an orgasm, pure and simple. Cultural constraints, modern media, lovers and friends can all influence how you might feel about your body, emotions and your ability to orgasm. Sometimes you just want what she's having and you want it now. If that's the case with you then find your lover, get playful and read this:

The famous anthropologist Desmond Morris wrote: "A group of 27 couples were asked to vary their sexual positions experimentally, employing postures that would allow greater stimulation of the two vaginal 'hot spots', and it was found that three-quarters of the females involved were then able to achieve regular vaginal orgasms."

In other words, it has been confirmed that becoming more uninhibited, playful and less self-conscious are all important ingredients in freeing orgasms and in producing multiple orgasms in women. Sexual liberation can translate to sexual ecstasy when a sense of freedom and playfulness is brought to lovemaking. Experimenting with even the most subtle of movements, or shifts of a single position, can make a huge difference in getting the right kind of stimulation. You can't find those distinctions unless you are playing.

Here's a position from the Kama Sutra that you can try being playful with. See my short video explaining a bit about the best angles of penetration for intercourse:

Kama Sutra Positions Angles Video

The Kama Sutra Position: The Splitting of the Bamboo
In this position the woman lies down on her back and the man straddles her as in the Missionary Position. She then raises one of her legs and places it on her lover's shoulder. Her other leg stretches out to the couple's side or she can bring it up closer to her body by bending it at the knee. After a brief time the legs are switched and then switched again creating a back and forth motion that can sweep the head of the penis across the G-spot in a windshield wiper like fashion.

In this position the woman may discover that one side works far better for her than the other. If the couple decides to stay in that position for a while she can begin to move her buttocks and legs in small, specific ways to increase the friction and pleasure. She can lift her buttocks, shift it to one side slightly, have her lover put a small pillow under her on one side or the other, slide her leg up further on his shoulder - I think you get the picture. There are a million subtle shifts that can occur that will make a significant difference in the results.

Try this one over the weekend. Let me know how it goes!



Suzie Heumann is the founder of Tantra.com. She studies, writes, has authored three books and makes films about conscious sex, Tantra and the Kama Sutra. Check out Tantra.com Premium for the most comprehensive tantra training available on the Internet!

Got Chakras?

I think about my charkas all of the time. They’re kind of ingrained in my mind. I have a relationship with my charkas. They inform me about how I’m doing, what I might want to shift about what I’m doing, how to perfect a certain posture or attitude, when to connect my heart with my powerful drive and more things like that. By using the understanding I have of my chakras in these ways I can promote my own better wellbeing.

One of the best ways I get in touch with my charkas is to sit and breathe from the base of my spine up to my crown, following my spine all the way up with my mind and breath. During each slow breathe in I quickly visualize each chakra as the breath moves through and past it. I will often do my Kegels, or more precisely bandas ( a banda is a lock of the PC muscles and the anal muscles), in a seven-step sequence to correspond to my charkas and breath movement up the spine. It’s easy to learn to do this and very effective to help learn to visualize the chakras more fully.

This all works especially well during intercourse as I can imagine the energy and upward thrusting coursing through my body and up towards my head. I can move the energy freely and effortlessly because I’ve had my solo practice. Even when it comes to simple belly breathing it’s very important to do some of the basic Tantric practices solo. Don’t expect to be able to be in full command of your mind and body if you haven’t done some practice by yourself!

If you’d like to learn more about the charkas here’s a good overview of them:
http://www.tantra.com/tantra/tantra_yoga/lesson_the_chakras.html

Pheromones – Can You Tell?

All animals use the sense of smell to tell them a lot of information about other members of their species. The only exception to this rule is with dolphins and whales. Their specific ‘noses’ migrated to the top of their heads as blowholes and thus they don’t have the benefit of smell that they once had eons ago. They do have, however, a very sophisticated system based on pheromones, as do the other animals in our fair kingdom.
It turns out that when researchers turn off the nerve in rats that connects the brain to the small, specialized area of the olfactory bulb that understands the signals that pheromones send, the rats don’t mate.

Rats have much better olfactory systems than humans do. Humans, in fact, have lost a lot of their sense of smell to other organs like the eyes. We just don’t need it as much as other animals, or do we? In small studies there is evidence that women on birth control pills have less response to pheromones. These women may be missing some of the important features of sensual attraction. And in a study of erotic dancers it was discovered that tips increased by up to 70% on nights when the women dancers were ovulating. There isn’t anything else that points to why this might be than the presents of pheromones.

If you’d like to discover the more subtle world of pheromones take a sniff behind your lover’s ear or underarms after they’ve been working in a warm environment for a few hours. Make sure they don’t have cologne on – it covers up scent and pheromones (so don’t wear it guys!). Does the scent turn you on? In a blind study women who, unbeknownst to them, either smelled a man’s pheromones or a more neutral scent, while trying to assess the attractiveness of pictures of different men always rated the men higher in attractiveness when they smelled the pheromones. It just turned them on more!

So, how do you get some of those pheromones? Don’t wear cologne or perfume. It interferes with our olfactory senses. Kiss more. Nose to nose gets us up close and intimate with the pheromones that are near our necks, ears, hair and nose. Those little chemical messengers don’t have to travel as far to reach their goal, either. Take more time to use your nose, even if you don’t think you smell anything while cuddling. Keep doing it because they are there. Treat your lover to a non-visual sensual date sometime. Blindfold them and bring out different pleasant scents that you can gently wave in front of their noses to tempt and mystify them. Suzie Heumann

What Do Singing, Throats, Orgasm and the Vagus Nerve Have To Do With It?

It’s fairly gorgeous in Sonoma County this time of year and the days are getting warmer. This afternoon I rode in my car with my windows down and the radio blasting. The song was Tina Turner’s What’s Love Got To Do With It. It doesn’t matter as much what song it was as that it is a full-throated, lusty song, one that you have to open up your mouth to sing and open it big. And you have to open up your throat, too.

When we open up to sing that fully, especially songs that have a deep, lower resonance to them, we are triggering and using our vagus nerve. The vagus nerve is a big one. It’s long and it branches a lot of times as it snakes throughout our body. You can look it up on any resource site to understand it better.

But what those research sites don’t say is that not only does it innervate the throat and chest, it is directly connected to the cervix and uterus. What does this mean for women’s pleasure? Beverly Whipple and Barry Komisaruk have investigated the vagus nerve and deep vaginal orgasms in women who have spinal cord injuries. This spinal cord compromise causes them to lack feeling in their lower extremities, thus not allowing them the capability to feel orgasms by other nerve structures. The vagus nerve doesn’t travel through the spinal cord, however. Deep, penetrative sexual activities trigger orgasm via this nerve, even in these women, and they can feel the orgasms.

Here is what I am speculating: That opening up the mouth, chest cavity and orgasmic capacities via the vagus nerve may lead to powerful orgasms and possibly multiples and female ejaculation. When women emit deep, low sounds from their abdomens and with their mouths wide open this can sometimes lead to longer lasting, powerful orgasms and even female ejaculation. This all makes sense if you consider that the vagus nerve connects all of these functions, throat, chest, cervix and uterus, and that when they are utilized to the fullest extent of the nerve, and all of its endings, the nerve becomes so activated that it produces out of body pleasure that is more than the sum of its parts, so to speak.

I had a direct transmission of this ‘action’ years ago from Caroline Muir but I have puzzled over it until I learned about this nerve. During some filming with the Muirs that my husband and I did, I noticed some deep, moaning sounds she had made during her orgasms and ejaculation demonstration. Her mouth was wide open and the sounds were coming from down deep inside her abdomen. Making these kinds of sounds also causes a ‘pushing’ down or out, as in childbirth, of the pelvic floor and genitals, giving even better access to the depths of the yoni. You can even feel this when you are simply singing full-throated songs. The diaphragm pushes downward on the pelvis. I tried copying her sounds and had an immediate experience of multiple orgasms and female ejaculation that continued unabated for a long time. How and why would these conditions all work together to produce such extremes in orgasmic pleasure? Is the vagus nerve the ‘unusual’ suspect?

So, any thoughts or similar experiences would be interesting. I don’t care how speculative they are, I would love to know other’s thoughts on this subject.

Suzie Heumann

Why Does Surprising Your Partner Trigger So Much Excitement and Pleasure?

Novelty increases the amount of dopamine, a neurotransmitter, available to the blood stream and brain. Dopamine is associated with the parts of the brain that involve pleasure and rewards. When we meet a new person and fall in love serotonin levels are suppressed and Dopamine levels are increased. Love is new. It’s exciting. It’s intense and it propels the lovers to do things to win their new, potential lover/partner. It’s a feedback system.

This same feedback system can be employed to re-create intensity in a longer-term partnership. It can be used consciously to up the ante. But, caution is required too because the unconscious drive to keep upping the ante can cause problems. Dopamine is kind of addictive (think Cocaine). There is the possibility that trying to hold on to the intensity will drive one or both of the couple to seek adventures that are outside the boundaries of the other.

We’re an intensity driven society. This may be why we are seeing an increase in things like threesomes, cheating, swinging, polyamory, BDSM and other behaviors. The desire for creating new, hot, and deeper connections may also lead the other direction to the recent interest in Tantric sex and the arts of the Kama Sutra.

Exciting new behaviors, practices, positions and other creative bedroom endeavors take very little thought and can add a lot to a long-term relationship. Some of the things you can try are making love in some place other than the bedroom, changing your bedroom to seem like another place, using blindfolds, restraints and pleasure-inducing items (think velvet, makeup brushes, silk, satin, rose petals, feathers) to treat your erotic skin with new sensations. Dress-up in something you usually wouldn’t, undress your partner to a slow, sexy favorite piece of music, learn a new sexual trick and try it out, wear a wig or high heals or both, have sex with your sexy underwear on, play with each other, under your napkins, during a dinner at a sexy restaurant or do a strip-tease for your lover. Get wild.

Or…sign-up for the Tantra.com Premium Member’s area and create a lifetime of pleasure, enlightenment, hot sex, subtle nuances and far deeper intimacy. It’ll fuel your craving for novelty and will increase your dopamine levels in the ‘good’ sense of addiction!

Blessings,
Suzie Heumann

The Best Sex Positions for Female Orgasms - Part 3

Sometimes it takes becoming more uninhibited to try Rear-Entry Positions. If either partner is self-conscious of their body then that is the first thing to let go of so that both can enjoy this fabulous category of positions. There isn’t a person alive who thinks they have a perfect body.

Gals, most men love looking at jiggling breasts and round buttocks. They aren’t going to be critical if they know you are enjoying every minute of the pleasure the two of you are creating so go for an edge and let go into the experience and the pleasure.

If you haven’t discovered how to find your G-spot yet then that’s a good place to start to amplify the sexual ecstasy from Rear-Entry Positions. There are some good articles on Tantra.com for this. It’s best to explore your G-spot with fingers and dildos before expecting to have orgasms via intercourse. It’s a fast path to G-spot orgasms, once you’ve had a taste of orgasmic sensations with a little sex play, so hang in there. These explorations may also lead to multiple orgasms in women, or men, and possibly female ejaculation.

Without a doubt this is one of the best position groups there is. Your ‘animal’ nature can really let loose! Rear-Entry Positions aren’t always the most appropriate, though. The moment must be right. This is because it’s often more appropriate to be facing each other. Eye contact, breath connection, heart chakra connection and deepened intimacy are all facilitated through facing your partner.

Rear-entry positions enhance G-spot stimulation. In addition, they leave the man’s hands free to touch and stimulate the secondary erogenous zones along the back and buttocks and the breasts and chest, much like the tiger that uses his paws and teeth. Variety is easy to come by in this position. You can adjust the angle of penetration, the ways you move about and the depth of penetration in the basic position. This allows the woman to tailor-make the experience for herself while having a lot of room to increase the pleasure for her partner. It also enables the woman or the man to stimulate her clitoris.

Try this position first up on your knees, instead of having the woman flat, on her stomach. It’s best for her to support herself with both her hands so that she can keep her spine moving and undulating. Make a study of how it feels as this is a base to explore from. Use the different ‘modalities’ of rhythms and depths of penetration. Try pumping and squeezing your PC muscles in this position.

Now, try sitting down on your thighs. What has changed? Take notice. What works for you in this variation when you apply the different ‘modalities’ of movement to the position? Lean forward and lie your head down. This is a good position to stimulate your partner’s inner thighs. You can also help him stay focused on non-ejaculatory pleasure by applying pressure to his perineum (the external area between the anus and the scrotum that covers his Prostate Gland or P-spot). This will help him from going over the top, so to speak.

Keep these exercises soft, fun and explorative. Take your time and enjoy every delicious moment. You are becoming an artist – enjoy it!
Suzie Heumann
Tantra.com

The Best Sex Positions for Female Orgasms Part 2

The famous anthropologist Desmond Morris wrote:

“A group of 27 couples were asked to vary their sexual positions experimentally, employing postures that would allow greater stimulation of the two vaginal 'hot spots', and it was found that three-quarters of the females involved were then able to achieve regular vaginal orgasms.”

In other words, it has been confirmed that becoming more uninhibited and less self-conscious is an important ingredient in freeing orgasms and in producing multiple orgasms in women. Sexual liberation can translate to sexual ecstasy when a sense of freedom and playfulness is brought to lovemaking. Experimenting with even the most subtle of movements, or shifts of a single position, can make a huge difference in getting the right kind of stimulation.

Let’s look at the position from the Kama Sutra called the Splitting of the Bamboo. In this position the woman lies down on her back and the man straddles her as in the Missionary Position. She then raises one of her legs and places it on her lover’s shoulder. Her other leg stretches out to the couples side or she can bring it up closer to her body by bending it at the knee. After a brief time the legs are switched and then switched again creating a back and forth motion that can sweep the head of the lingam across the G-spot in a windshield wiper like fashion.

In this position the woman may discover that one side works far better for her than the other. If the couple decides to stay in that position for a while she can begin to move her buttocks and legs in small, specific ways to increase the friction and pleasure. She can lift her buttocks, shift it to one side slightly, have her lover put a small pillow under her on one side or the other, slide her leg up further on his shoulder – I think you get the picture. There are a million subtle shifts that can occur that will make a significant difference in the results!

None of this is possible, though, unless the woman knows her hot-spots intimately, which is why she must self-pleasure and discover them. Oh, and it takes a lover who is willing to explore and have fun trying new things. Rear Entry Positions are next so stay tuned!