Do You Want to Be Connected or Connected?

Are we really willing to go without touch, kissing, pheromones, orgasms, tender whispers and all of the exquisite accompaniments to Love this easily?

A study released this week from Germany on 19-29 year olds being willing to let go of their partner instead of their Internet connection and their cell phones is astonishing, to say the least. Maybe it is a generational thing. After all I’m in my mid fifties and have really only had a cell phone for maybe a tenth of my life (I was a late hold-out for no cell phone!). Two of my daughters have had cell phones for at least half of their lives, however, and they are in their 20’s. And they have had access to computers for almost all of their lives. So to them the use of these technology tools is ubiquitous. Yet I don’t think they would agree with this survey.

I’m not going to analyze it. I can’t because it is not ‘me’. What I’m addicted to is the deep connection that comes from love and sex and the ‘drugs’ that it produces in me. As humans we become kind of ‘addicted’ to oxytocin, the bonding chemical, dopamine, the desire chemical, pheromones, the attraction chemicals and on and on. These potent chemical messengers are what draw us to connect with another person. They become active when we get physically close to another person, not through cell phone connections.

I have always imagined and longed for a time when many people adopt Tantric practices. I believe the sexual part of Tantra is necessary for the consciousness part to evolve into an equilibrium of conscious love, compassion and a personal understanding of the depth within each of us. But this requires being physically close to others, whether they are lovers or not. It is pretty scary to think that the next generations, in some places, don't have this framework by which to live their lives. Tantric practices are now needed more than ever.

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